A woman on our newsletter list asked me how she could help her 19-year-old son “turn into a good man.”

Here is my response: My best recommendation is to have him be around mature men. It could be a dad, teachers, coaches, uncles, mentors…. Here are some other resources:

Books for Personal Growth and Becoming a Better Man:

1. “Man’s Search for Meaning” by Viktor Frankl A profound book that helps young men understand the importance of purpose and responsibility.
2. “No More Mr. Nice Guy” by Dr. Robert Glover For young men who might have been misunderstood, this book helps balance assertiveness with kindness and responsibility.
3. “Meditations” by Marcus Aurelius Introduces stoic philosophy, teaching discipline, resilience, and emotional intelligence.
4. “Wild at Heart” by John Eldredge Explores the adventurous, risk-taking nature of men while guiding them toward responsibility and emotional depth.

Actions He Can Take to Grow:

1. Practice Responsibility Encourage him to take small steps, like committing to a job, studying, or completing a project. Responsibility builds character and self-esteem.
2. Engage in Volunteering or Helping Others Serving others helps develop empathy and humility. Encourage him to volunteer at a shelter, mentor younger kids, or contribute to a community project.
3. Therapy or Coaching Working with a coach or therapist who specializes in men’s issues can help him identify patterns and make meaningful changes.
4. Set and Achieve Goals Goal-setting teaches discipline and focus. Start with small, achievable goals that lead to larger aspirations.
5. Take on Challenges Learn that failure is not death.
6. Develop Emotional Awareness Teach him to name, feel, and process emotions. Journaling, meditation, or practicing mindfulness can help.

How You Can Help:

1. Encourage Conversations Create a safe space where he feels supported and heard, even if he’s made mistakes.
2. Set Clear Boundaries Support him with love but also set expectations for behavior that aligns with respect and growth.
3. Celebrate Small Wins – As Well As Loses When he shows positive changes, acknowledge and celebrate his effort.

If He Prefers a Digital or Interactive Approach:

1. Podcasts
   • The Art of Manliness
   • ManTalks
   • The MELD Community Podcast (Coming Soon)
2. Online Courses Websites like Udemy or Skillshare have personal development courses tailored for young men.
3. Community Engagement Encourage him to explore social groups that align with his interests, whether sports, coding, music, or something else constructive. At MELD, we offer a free community for men and a powerful intro course into the tools that, as men, we don’t get. Core teaches somatic and other skills that can fast-track our development.