From Resistance to Resilience: Journey Through Fear

Part 1: Moving through the Portal of Fear

The Step That Changes Everything — What’s Holding You Back?

You have felt it — that tug. A feeling that something in your life needs to shift, but resistance holds you in place. Fear whispers, “Not yet.” Resistance tells you, “You’re fine where you are.”

We have all been there. Resistance is not just a wall; it is the voice of past survival. It is the freeze response, deeply rooted in moments when you could not act. Back then, freezing was protection: it kept you safe. But now? It is holding you back.

Steven Pressfield calls this resistance the “force” that arises whenever we approach something deeply meaningful. Resistance is sneaky — it not only blocks your path; it convinces you that staying still is the safer, smarter choice.

But here is the truth: resistance is not the enemy. It is your compass, pointing toward what matters most. That knot in your stomach, that hesitation — it is a signal. The very thing you are afraid to do is often the thing you most need to do. Or at least to explore.

Why Resistance Feels So Overwhelming

Let’s break it down. Resistance is not just mental; it is physical. It is tied to your nervous system, a survival response rooted in your biology. When we freeze, it is because some part of us believes that action is not safe.

But here’s the thing: the situations that caused that freeze are no longer here. What remains is the habit, the automatic response. Now, that same freeze is sabotaging you.

Ask yourself:

  • From what is the fear protecting me?
  • Is this fear still relevant, or has it outlived its purpose?

Resistance feels overwhelming because it is tied to old stories and unmet needs. But just because it feels true does not mean it is true.

What’s the Worst That Could Happen?

Fear thrives on exaggeration. It whispers: “What if you fail? What if you look foolish? What if this changes everything?”

Pause. Breathe. Ask yourself these questions and feel the response in your body and with your emotions —  go beyond what your head tells you:

  • Of what am I actually afraid?
  • What is the worst-case scenario if I take one small step?

Now flip the question:

  • What is at risk if I stay where I am?
  • What will it cost me to avoid this moment?

We like to think staying still is safe. But the deeper truth? Staying stuck costs you far more. Disconnection. Missed opportunities. A life half-lived.

A Personal Story: The Price of Resistance

I know resistance well. For years, I was a master of it. My mind crafted countless reasons to avoid action. I surrounded myself with people who reinforced my inaction. And for a while, it worked. I stayed in my comfort zone.

But life kept nudging me. My pain grew louder. The disconnection in my relationships, the stagnation in my own growth — it all started to weigh more than the fear of change.

Eventually, I realized that the cost of staying still was too high. The fear did not disappear, but I learned to move with it. That’s when things started to shift.

The Portal Is Waiting

Here is the invitation: step through. Risk the discomfort, the vulnerability, the uncertainty. On the other side, you will find strength, clarity, and connection — not just to others, but to yourself.

And here’s the good news: you do not have to do it alone. At MELD, we walk through that portal with you.

To Reflect: This week, sit with these questions:

  • What is one small step I could take toward the thing I have been avoiding?
  • Who do I want to be on the other side of this fear?

Take the step. Even if it’s imperfect, it’s yours.

Go here for part 2.