The Hidden Cost of Working for Yourself
The Hidden Cost of Working for Yourself The part no one tells you about independence is that it removes more than constraints. It removes daily contact—and the nervous system notices long before the mind does. Before you read further, do one small check. Look back over the last five workdays and name how many conversations […]
Affirmations don’t fail. They reveal.
Affirmations don’t fail. They reveal. As we affirm that our new year will be better, let’s look at how affirmations actually work. Affirmations don’t change your reality unless your body can tolerate the truth they’re pointing toward, and when it can’t, they don’t motivate you; they expose the lie you’ve been living inside. Pick one […]
Why Regulation Comes Before Insight: What New Trauma Research Confirms About Group-Based Somatic Work
Why Regulation Comes Before Insight: What New Trauma Research Confirms About Group-Based Somatic Work Every so often, a study doesn’t just add data—it clarifies direction. A recent PLOS ONE research protocol examines a group-based, somatic trauma intervention for women who survived sexual violence. At first glance, that may seem outside the scope of men’s work. […]
The Third Body: Why Congruence Is a Group Event
Why Alignment Feels Like Safety Congruence Isn’t Just an Inside Job Most of the men I work with come to believe that congruence is an inside job. Get clear. Get aligned. Match what you feel with what you say and do. It’s a clean idea, and it sounds right. It just doesn’t work as well […]
The New Era of Men’s Retreats: Why MELD Prime Works When Emotion Alone Doesn’t
The New Era of Men’s Retreats: Why MELD Prime Works When Emotion Alone Doesn’t Where Men’s Work Began and Why It Had to Evolve In the last two decades, men’s retreats have gone from fringe to mainstream. Early programs like Mankind Project (MKP) helped thousands of men break the silence around emotion. They made it […]
When Strength Becomes a Cage: How Men Can Redefine Success and Connection
When Strength Becomes a Cage: How Men Can Redefine Success and Connection In a world that celebrates false stoicism and success over connection and authenticity, many men find themselves silently struggling. On the surface, life seems perfect: successful careers, stable families, and well-earned respect. But beneath it all lies a growing sense of emptiness. If […]
How Men Really Change: Inside the Physiology of Transformation in a Retreat
How Men Really Change: Inside the Physiology of Transformation in a Retreat Men are taught to think their way into change, read another book, make another plan, and set another intention. But fundamental transformation isn’t a mental event; it’s physiological. What we call “stuck” is often a body running an old stress program. At MELD […]
How the Vagus Nerve Heals the Body and Builds Connection
How the Vagus Nerve Heals the Body and Builds Connection Two leading scientists have shown how one nerve sits at the center of both health and relationships. Neurosurgeon Kevin Tracey, MD (author of The Great Nerve), demonstrates how the vagus nerve regulates inflammation and restores physiological balance. Behavioral neuroscientist Stephen Porges, PhD (author of The […]
Behavior Is Contagious—So What Are You Catching?
Behavior Is Contagious—So What Are You Catching? I’ve been listening to Malcolm Gladwell’s Revenge of the Tipping Point, and it struck a nerve. Not because it’s about dramatic social shifts or political pivots, but because it confirmed something I’ve seen quietly changing men’s lives for years: Behavior doesn’t just change because someone “tries harder.” Behavior […]
Where Are All the Elders? The Missing Piece Men Are Searching For
Where Are All the Elders? The Missing Piece Men Are Searching For Something happened in one of our groups recently that’s been sitting with me. A man raised his hand and asked if we could spend the evening talking about elderhood. Not because he was old, he wasn’t, because he felt the absence of it. […]