This article was written by Owen Marcus, who started and led — and subsequently trained other men to lead — successful groups around North America. His book Grow Up: A Man’s Guide to Masculine Emotional Intelligence, has helped thousands of men. His Sandpoint Men’s Group and its method were the focus of a documentary film. He has established three companies that support men. MELD applies the 70 years of research that Owen’s 30 years of group experience utilize to give men an effective way to change in a short period of time.
A Comprehensive Guide for Men
Gentlemen, whether you are scaling a business, raising a family, or both, you have likely felt the weight of expectations. Men’s groups offer a powerful solution — a dedicated space where men like you come together to support each other through shared experiences, personal growth, and mutual understanding. These groups provide a platform to discuss topics you might not feel comfortable sharing elsewhere, fostering a sense of community that is often missing in our busy lives.
Imagine a collective of men, perhaps fellow entrepreneurs or fathers, who meet regularly to explore various aspects of life. From personal challenges to professional ambitions and interpersonal relationships, these groups vary in focus. Some concentrate on emotional support, while others delve into personal development or specific interests like fatherhood, health, or balancing work and family life.
The “70-Year History of Men’s Work” page on the MELD Community website traces the evolution of masculinity and men’s roles over several decades, discussing the shifts from enforced stoicism in the 1950s to the mythopoetic movement of the late 20th century, which embraced emotional expression. It covers the rise of men’s groups in the 1970s and the more recent focus on holistic health and collaborative community efforts. This historical perspective culminates in the adoption of the MELD Method, which integrates science with emotional and relational connections for comprehensive personal and professional growth.
As a successful man juggling multiple responsibilities, you might find it challenging to discuss personal issues with those in your regular circles. Perhaps you are concerned about appearing vulnerable or burdening your loved ones. In the confidential and safe environment of a men’s group, you can freely discuss any aspect of your life, receiving support and diverse perspectives from others who have likely faced similar challenges in their businesses or families.
In a men’s group, the process of sharing and listening is highly valued. Each participant, whether a seasoned CEO or a new father, gets a chance to update the group on their life events, and then the collective provides feedback and support. This setup not only helps the individual receiving assistance but also enhances the emotional intelligence and empathy of the group as a whole — skills that are invaluable in both boardrooms and living rooms.
Breaking Down Stereotypes: What to Expect in a Men’s Group
Men’s groups go beyond simple sharing circles. They can involve a variety of activities that cater to the needs and preferences of the group. While some groups may enjoy traditional bonding exercises, most focus on discussing real-life issues such as relationship dynamics, career challenges, health concerns, and personal development. Each meeting is structured to allow deep dives into topics that require the most attention, facilitated by questions and discussions that aim to clarify and explore the issues thoroughly.
The reasons men join these groups are as varied as the individuals themselves. For an entrepreneur with a family, common motivations include handling the pressures of running a business while maintaining a strong family life, navigating career transitions, dealing with the challenges of fatherhood, or seeking a greater work-life balance. Moreover, men’s groups can foster real friendships and provide a network of support that extends beyond the meetings — something precious for busy professionals.
In today’s society, men often face pressures to adhere to traditional masculine roles, which can discourage open expression of emotions or admitting vulnerabilities. This is especially true for those in leadership positions. Men’s groups provide a safe space to counter these norms, offering support and understanding in a confidential setting. They serve as vital outlets for stress relief, mental health support, and personal exploration — all crucial for maintaining peak performance in both business and family life.
Men’s groups can be structured in various ways, depending on their specific focus and the needs of their members:
For a man in your position, joining a men’s group offers numerous benefits:
Men from all walks of life join these groups, including:
Finding and joining a men’s group can be a transformative step:
Men who participate in these groups often experience significant positive changes:
In 1995, I initiated my first official men’s group within my integrated medical clinic in Scottsdale, AZ, employing traditional training methods. While effective, after a decade, these methods seemed limited. Seeking deeper impact, I leveraged thirty years of training from leading figures in somatic and traditional therapies. This enriched approach proved successful in my clinic and inspired the formation of the Sandpoint Men’s Group. Over the past twenty years, this method has significantly evolved, culminating in the development of MELD, which far exceeded my initial expectations.
For men like you who are balancing the demands of a full life and family life, men’s groups play a crucial role. They provide a space to grow, share, and connect without judgment, challenging traditional notions of masculinity and offering a supportive network that can lead to profound personal and professional transformations. Whether you are facing business challenges, seeking to improve your work-life balance, or simply looking for meaningful connections with like-minded individuals, a men’s group could be the supportive community you need to thrive in all aspects of your life.
Over the past five years, the proliferation of men’s groups has been truly inspiring. Initially considered marginal, these groups are now recognized widely. Following the establishment of the Sandpoint Men’s Group, its innovative approach gained attention, prompting requests for training across North America. In response, I developed the Group Leaders Training (GLT), a comprehensive course that continues to evolve and is offered for free to all our members (membership is free). This initiative has seen tremendous success, though challenges remained for those without prior training. To address this, I designed a course ten years ago, now known as the MELD Core program. Distinguished by a study published in an APA journal, this program, led and refined by Mike Sagun, offers unparalleled depth and effectiveness in group leadership training. Participants often leave transformed, exceeding their initial expectations.
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